On the brink of destruction (2010-11-17)

Dear Gallus,

So a reader asked me an interesting question via email- if me going home would affect my progress with you and while I said I didn't think so, it did get me thinking...

And then I had this really real really bizarre dream about you the other night- not sexy this time, actually strangely normal. You came to see me to talk and we did...it was weird.

Anyway this combination of factors means you have been on my mind and...yeah, I don't think I like where this is going...

Essentially my mind wanders into dangerous territory where I imagine a world where you are single and more importantly actually have your shit together and I get to have what I always wanted. Sigh.

The truth is, I would love to have it all go back to the way it was before we got together when you were chasing me and I got to have you worship me and hold me before everything went to hell.

But then I remember reality. Would I love it if you turned around and begged me for forgiveness and you had really changed and treated me the way I always wanted?


Do I think that that will ever actually happen?



See, dangerous territory...


heart - break

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