Dear Readers,

So yet again I find myself at a crossroads. I found out today that my pay is being cut, which I was kind of expecting, but I am a bit peeved that my manager didn't actually tell me on Friday.

Anywho, as a result of this I FINALLY spoke to my consultant about how much I hate the half that I hate, to the point of quitting and he said that there was actually a post on offer, from mid Dec that is full time the stuff I love- wooohoooo.

But here's the catch- might be even less money and in the meantime I would be leaving my current caseload in the lurch. Ironically I don't give a shit about the high risk kids, because as far as I am concerned that place being shit has brought it upon themselves, and fuck it, they don't listen to me anyway, so what is the point?

But my HI kiddies and in particular the schools I am in on that side, I do feel kind of bad about. The only thing I can think is (if I get the other post) I will have a whole new caseload of cute little ones to get to know and signing to do and and it will be ALL THE TIME. Excitement!!!

But I feel bad with the others, I really do. And I'm torn, do I stick out the shit stuff til March, knowing that I will at least be earning some cash, then when it goes half time, see what is on offer, either getting something else half contract, or a whole new post...

OR do I say fuck it, look after myself emotionally and go for it full time, regardless of the carnage??

I seriously need some advice here and it's only 5.15am back home, so much too early to call just yet...

Damn. I need help!

-Me

heart - break