Dear readers,

So, it's been a while. Things that have happened in the intervening period:

I went for 2 different jobs and got offered one of them. I then freaked out about said job offer, but ended up accepting it anyway.

It's in hearing impairment, which is awesome, but it's super far away and part time and the pay sucks BUT it is in hearing impairment IN A BILINGUAL PROGRAM, which is rare as fuck, so I really did have to take it.

After much toing and froing I organised to drive back home for Xmas.

I went to go see my bestie and her kids and got no sleep, but still felt refreshed and free from the beige for the first time in a long time.

I finally got off my arse with my dissertation which is starting to take shape- not helped by my supervisor having the memory of a goldfish however.

Speaking of which, I should also mention the things that have not happened in the intervening time:

I haven't heard anything from the boy. Nada, zip, zilch. No apology for the birthday thing, no attempts to catch up and he hasn't been at any mutual events either.

And, I won't lie, I'm pissed. I had thought I was over it, but for some reason this week it's all been dredged back up again (possibly because I am sick as a dog and feeling sorry for myself) so I just went and tortured myself by looking at his Facebook where he has of course responded to all of these people SO WHY THE FUCK COULDN'T HE SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY?!

Fucking asshole!

Why oh why do I do this to myself? Why do I always attract/become attracted to douchebags who are un available in some kind of major way?

I don't know why this keeps repeating itself, I mean, I get it, I know I need to not go for these guys, but at the same time they are all I seem to meet, so seriously universe, stop fucking with me already!

I am so over this bullshit.

-me

heart - break