Dear Readers,

So, I have had a disappointing downer of a week, on the back of a shit month all round really.

First things first, as per usual, things did not work out with the MONA guy. He apparently met someone else- I am suss about this and actually suspect he was already seeing her before he met me, but it just wasn't 'official', but whatever, the outcome is the same. No go.

I came down with glandular fever- not sure if MONA guy gave it to me, or one of the kids, either way, I was seriously fucking sick for a week with fever, chills, vomiting, aches and pains and general exhaustion. Subsequently it seems to have fucked with my liver and general digestive system, which is super fun, not.

This big project at work, which was meant to be an awesome, career changing thing, is quickly turning into a nightmare and I'm seriously tempted to pack it all in.

I went for a grant- that I sort of pinned my hopes on and put a whole bunch of shit on hold for- and found out earlier this week that I didn't even get an interview. What the actual fuck? The worst part is that I can't even find out if it was me and my age/relative lack of experience, or my actual project that was the problem. This affects whether or not I bother to apply next year.

And I'm fucking bummed. I'm also pissed because it proves my stupid brother right. Asshole.

And then there's the fact that a friend (not super close, but someone I did like as a person) from high school died from a brain tumour last week. He was only 29. And it was his funeral today and I couldn't go. So I feel ridiculous for even being upset, because of the whole tragedy of that situation for him and his family. He was a good guy, didn't live a crazy lifestyle or anything like that (didn't smoke, didn't do drugs, not a big drinker etc.) and he doesn't even make it to 30. What the fuck?!

All in all, I am feeling rather down.

I want a hug. Preferably one of the ones that then turns into sex. Except, oh yeah, that is still an issue. FML.

-Me

heart - break