The instinct (2003-10-20)

Dear Panda,

I finally saw you last night for the first time in three months. And I hugged you so tight, I never wanted to let you go. I knew that you had slept with someone else within the last week, but I didn't care, I was so damn happy to see you.

Then when you were affectionately giving me shit I looked at you and actually had to prevent myself from leaning up and kissing you, laughing into your mouth.

And I almost screamed in panic at the thought.

Because it wasn't sexual, oh no, that I could just blame on hormones and frustration, no this was pure and unadulterated love. And I'm not sure what kind and that scares the hell out of me. All I know is that I almost kissed you, not for any particular reason, but just because it was the most natural instinct in the world.

Nevermind that you're 8 years older than me.

Nevermind that you are the emotional equivalent of a sphinx.

I think I'm in serious trouble here...


heart - break

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